The residents of Jaaba where the Indians bombed said that them and their children fell unconscious owing to the sound or impact of the bombing. I saw this a little while after I bawled my eyes out at watching Cdr Abhinandan’s half swollen face on TV.

My father’s first cousin was taken a Prisoner of War in 1971. His name didn’t show up in the list of PoWs when truce was called yet my father’s aunt kept insisting “my heart says my child is alive”. He was placed at an undisclosed hideout with a number of other similarly undeclared prisoners of war where he bribed the caretaker/ jailer with the only thing he had. A Sheaffers pen. Only to post a letter he wrote to a distant relative of my father’s (other side of the family) in the USA so it won’t be intercepted through post, explaining the place they were kept and how many and who all were there. Those relatives then took the letter to the embassy and eventually the government and that’s how they were pulled out of what apparently was an abyss they were doomed within.

Yet. I pleaded on Twitter. To let Wing Cdr Abhinandan go. To treat him well and abide by the Geneva Convention. Not just because I grew up along side the firsthand affected of the story here, hearing about it. Seeing the extra wrinkles and white hair it brought to them, perhaps even reduced life expectancy but because of the following five reasons.

Only because I think.

a) Every country in the world needs to rethink war.

These boys are in their 20s. Young lives. Young dreams. Young hearts. Yet we damn them in the name of nationalism, patriotism, protection of the country call it whatever. We make use of those racing hormones and that emotional age stage when we can easily pump them up to put their lives up in the name of protecting their nation.

b) I’d like to believe the world is more civilised today than collecting real estate in the name of “conquering” places. We as a species seem to have moved beyond that so why this remnant love for the proverbial “this land is my land”?

Our issues today are different and farther away from finding a water body, fertile land and space to set camp and grow generations. The world is already overpopulated. We now have civilised ways to emigrate if we want to live somewhere new. What’s with the waving swords, conquering “lands”? Relax.

c) War is not a kite fight (paichaa). People die. Hoards of them. Indiscriminately. Even more are left disabled and/ or scarred for life. Eco system is wrecked. It takes decades for economies to recover if they ever fully do so. So the entire war drums and chest beating? Please take that to the jungle.

d) We do need war though.

War against patriarchy for conventional war is the worst form of its manifestation where only power prevails and no sense does.

War against poverty for we only have as much as we do by the grace of God. It’s only by chance that we weren’t born below the poverty line.

War against hunger for famine and poverty again is indiscriminate and with all the flowing gilded coins, people still die of hunger in this world. That alone is worth pondering over.

War against illiteracy for the lack of education leads to the worst pit of suffering a nation can possibly see. India and Pakistan should know with their public lynching by enraged mobs records. Enough said.

War against economic upheaval. We need to fix our economic situation before slapping war paint on our faces. Seriously. Think about it. Not a dime in our pockets and here we are, inciting war that costs guess what? Gobs of money.

e) I’m a mom. Think like one.

I now feel things I have never felt in my life.

Though the aforementioned logical factors are what would’ve occurred to me regardless, I felt my ovaries die a thousand deaths when I heard that blindfolded, bloodied boy ask “Sir is this the Pakistan Army I am speaking to?” Even though it gave me comfort later seeing him at ease and being taken care of, THINK! THINK!! It could’ve been any of our kids. He has a mother, a father, a wife maybe some kids too. I don’t know. He’s a boy. Who was perhaps sent to Bomb our territory and kill innocent people like that little girl in Jaaba who would just keep hugging and kissing her little goat she called “Gulaab” (Rose).

When we choose war, we sit back and make our children kill our children. For kids are all our own right?

Bachchay sab ke saanjhay.

بچے سب کے سانجھے۔

That’s what we say, right?

When I was searching for hashtags to post this on Instagram, it was bittersweet for I wanted to put up something that said Motherhood through war and I didn’t find a single post tagged as such. There was Motherhood through words and Pakistan brought up the Pakistani Food Hashtag. India instantly brought Indian Weddings and Indian Jokes hashtag. Not a single thing about War or striving for peace.

Then what is this war mongering, chest thumping, jingoism, war drums madness for these two countries sticking out like a sore thumb?

I usually try to ignore the keyboard illiteracy brigade. Those who comment on showbiz posts ridiculing women, making crass jokes usually at the cost of a woman’s respect and honour or will post slang and slurs towards anything they disagree with. Both India and Pakistan are filled to the brim with such characters who will perhaps piss themselves if they actually come across anyone in real life, they so valiantly slander online.

It is that same group of people who are treating war as some sort of a cricket match right now. Cheering on, inciting more hatred.

(Sadly, the other side of the border saw some very learned and seemingly liberal and peace purporting individuals participate in the jingoism but I don’t even want to go there.)

This side of the border saw the same uncouth people throwing around a handful of unconfirmed pictures and a few old photos of tanks (I mean, seriously?) across social media with celebratory emojis that the countries are at war.

I don’t expect them to stop and think about the repercussions of war or think about what they’re promoting. Frankly I don’t think they have an ounce of grey matter to be able to process such complex thoughts that involve rational thinking but can we step up and limit their space? PLEASE?

Every time you see a hateful comment, click on that profile and report them to Facebook or Twitter. Each time you see someone spewing hatred, DO something to change that even if it is unfollowing them or unfriending them or even banning them from your view. That’s one less person they have access to!

Limit the illiteracy.

Limit the senseless barbarism.

If you can’t speak up and engage because that’s usually like jumping in the puddle, then

LIMIT.THEIR.SPACE.OF.IMPACT

That’s the least I can do to give my child a better tomorrow

Would you?