On the day of love let’s talk about how we love.
I recently went away on a quick escapade to Maldives with my child and a friend.
Where most people were happy for us there were many who reached out saying hawww. Without husband? Poor Faisal bhai.
Where so many fawned over the gorgeous pictures from the island there were some who reached out about their concern over my “tanning” child.
So let me talk a bit about how we do love in this family.
I was making 7 figures when I quit my day job to raise my child. My husband didn’t blink an eye.
While I am working night and day for a cause that is close to both our hearts, child and maternal health focusing on human lactation, I save up every penny to help with the charity organisation I build. I earn zero money out of it.
It is my husband’s love that still allows me to take a vacation I could once afford to take him on by myself.
It is love to be able to accept this because for me that was the toughest journey. I have been supporting myself since I was in my late teens and the first few months of not having a monthly salary, I was bewildered. 3 + years later it is LOVE that has opened my heart enough to accept when my husband wants to do something for me without a single thought that this isn’t mine.
I feel we don’t talk enough about how we all love in different ways.
My husband has never bought me a single gift but he loves every single move I make, every single day.
He will laugh when I will assign gift status to things I’ve bought. It’s been 3 years of me asking him for a gift commemorating the birth of our child and all he says is buy whatever you want baby!
Of course baby won’t know what to buy.
The biggest gift is a life that keeps on giving. One that has both my husband and my child in it.
So for those who worry about my husband not going with me on vacation, I love him and I always try to go check our a new place to figure if it is comfortable enough for him or not.
This wasn’t my first trip alone and it won’t be my last.
For those worrying about my child “tanning”. She was born dark because she wasn’t born to a fair skinned parent.
Fortunately/ Unfortunately she doesn’t know yet that the vultures surrounding her in this society outside her home and family have a preference and her natural skin colour is looked down at.
This would worry me to no end. Until I got some affirmation in the form of @2030mama sharing how Nava brushes off comments on her physical appearance because she modelled this for her. Thankfully I have a no nonsense approach towards these comments too and she’s probably learning! My little sponge is absorbing how we never discuss appearances and dismiss (read: snub) any mention of them too. I have hope in Sassi because there’s a Nava.
So whether it’s me having a good time without my husband or my child enjoying the beach, this year at this commercially hyped up day of love, let’s just learn to accept love in all its gorgeous ways.
