This is my child in the midst of a ginormous tantrum running through the main lobby of Tate Modern like a force to reckon with,
If you look closely, like really zoom up close, you’ll see another little human rolling on the floor near the horizon.
This gives me patience.
This takes my hope.
That life will ever be peaceful again.
This was a very difficult day for me when I actually questioned my choice to have a family for a split second, before dragging the screeching banshee to my heart despite her protests, vocal and physical.
It was indeed the tanking Vitamin D levels as well as my child’s endless tantrums that drove me to the edge.
I nearly cried, not knowing what to do to keep her from crying as if her cat died.
(Only to figure that she wasn’t having a proper breakfast as for two-three days in a row I took the liberty to luxuriously Hand her over to my sister for breakfast time. Poor soul, not knowing of my child’s ways would not be able to feed her enough and so the premature tantrums)
Then she did something.
As I herded her back to where our stuff was lying, a young boy walked over, picked up her ball (that she had just bought from the museum shop) and walked off. Before I could think of anything, a mother, flustered, came running, apologetic! “It’s alright” I said. “He’s a kid!”
“He’s autistic” age said. And I dreaded my scream happy child for the day walking over to him. As expected she screamed and within half the scream the mother took the ball and handed over to her. Before I could actually express my embarrassment, Sass saved it.
She walked over to the boy and handed him the ball. Walking back to me.
The boy smiled back at her.
This little nut has it all figured. I hope I’m able to help her loosen up on those control issues, where she wants to hand it over to give it away herself but that heart on a not yet two year old was astounding. Maybe all kids do such stuff but this is the only one I’m seeing up close and personal. Frankly the adults I see around me are devoid of any such emotions.
She gave it to the boy, without even looking back at it.
She shares her food. Gives away her toys she bought with a lot of love.
She does have a bigger heart than most adults I know.
We are going through a terrible tantrum phase where she will screech and either hug me hard enough to asphyxiate me or sit at the farthest end of the bed refusing to let me even touch her.
Through all of that I know my child is going through big emotions yet remaining the bigger person she is. I know I sometimes fail and get physically tired of “saving the day”
She’s still however, a child. My baby. Today and forever.
I’m not in favour of spoiling kids by permissive parenting but being gentle towards them is essential.
I bet we can’t manage a single day as a toddler.
Empathy is key.
Change is difficult for adults and these are babies who are still only getting used to their fast changing bodies and minds. Throw in a spinner by changing their continent and it will usually not end in a bed of Roses.
The more head strong your toddler, the more tantrums you will see. They will need things to be done their way.
For instance I know the major peeve she has nowadays. She hates being fed. She wants to eat herself with a fork or a spoon. For the past two days a bowl and a spoon are our saviour. It clashes with my hatred of mess but that’s my learning curve. I love my clutter but the throwing around of food and messiness makes me near hyperventilate.
I’m still working on fixing myself to deal with this myself.
With teething, brain development, growth spurts, sleep regression and everything in between, she’s being a trooper yet some days do kick the life out of me.
I still believe in kisses healing booboos of knees and those of heart, a good talk fixing most angst and hugs being the resolution of all issues.
I will run after her for as long as she runs away in anger until she starts running after me once again.
That’s my litmus for a tantrum resolved and I’m sticking to it!
